tips for when the dog goes GAAAAACK
Late last I heard Yogi start licking his chops and then that sound you never want to hear… GAAAAACK! I pulled the lamp on to thwart any re-regurgitation and luckily he somehow didn’t get any drops (or morsels I guess?) of his vomit on his dog bed. Thank God for hardwoods. Actually thank God for paper towels, because cleaning up barf with my bare hands would be horrible. I guess in reality, if paper towels weren’t invented I might use something else like a towel perhaps. I would adapt. I guess I should truly thank God for adaptation. That’s right adaptation it is what allows man to overcome dog barf. Victory.
After work, I met my buddy Jan for beers and some commiseration. Jan is GoodBuddyDoug’s older sister and my former babysitter, and also had a bad year. She lost her ex-husband to an inoperable brain cancer a few months ago.
I headed home and worked on the PERL code for NitroVideo and added some functionality to Open Grove Claudia’s search tool I wrote for her. I sat down with a glass of water (note: foreshadowing) and started watching On the Waterfront. I took a sip of the water (note: remember the earlier foreshadowing?) and patoooey! Time to change the sediment filter, stat. I probably got my recommended daily allowance of soil there in that one sip. So I hopped out of bed, started loosening the filter, dumped about 90 gallons of water on the floor, then remembered to shut of the water source, continued loosening the filter, changed it, and then called Yogi in to lap up the soil water (this might expain why he barfed?). I’m just kidding about Yogi lapping up the water, that would be cruel. I mopped it up with some bread and then fed it to Yogi. Just kidding, it was actually pound cake.
- My song A Fog used in a spoken word piece
- Is It Christmas?
- Make Your Own Attack Ad
November 28th, 2007 at 10:18 am
If you didn’t have a towel, then you could use the wet/dry vac.
But then you’d have to throw that away.
Right. Good thing for paper towels.
November 28th, 2007 at 10:25 am
Sounds like you had a nice, quiet evening in. I, on the other hand stayed out all night at a hip, happening club before coming home to find big girl dog to have layed a rather large load of poop on my bedroom floor. there was also about a gallon of pee deposited in another spot. AND to that end (see how I’m gonna bring it around town yet another day?) I hate carpet. Never had carpet until 3 months ago and it blows. It blows nasty bread and soil water chunks.
November 28th, 2007 at 10:53 am
You do a lot of mopping up of stuff on the floor don’t you?
November 28th, 2007 at 11:04 am
Franki – either that or i could load up the barfery into a catapult and launch it into the nearest neighbor’s pool. BTW, I emailed you to apologize for the old man scrotum joke in your comments I made on Nov 26th… as opposed to the old man scrotum jokes I made on other dates.
liv – is the “bring it around town” a Spongebob reference by any chance, because I’m thinking of his bubble blowing lessons now…
Jazz – usually not, but last night oui
November 28th, 2007 at 11:09 am
Yikes. Dog Vomit and Water Filter Vomit. That’s a lot of vomit.
Just so you know. Candy Corn will also make Yogi vomit. At least it made Rose vomit… the two times I gave it to you. OK! I’m not that bright!
Thanks for working on my cool search!
November 28th, 2007 at 11:11 am
Come along now, you’re an adult. Let’s put our heads together and figure out what we did about those kinds of messes before paper towels. Think now, think really hard. What on earth did we do?
Glad you had a break with your pal. It never ceases so amaze me how much human misery there is out there.
BEst wishes
November 28th, 2007 at 11:22 am
Now you’re just teasing me. I’ve got no emails apologizing about old man scrotums…oh except that one, but it wasn’t from you.
November 28th, 2007 at 11:25 am
Ohhh…that email.
November 28th, 2007 at 11:25 am
Open Grove Claudia – no problem. Candy corn makes me vomit too, well when mixed with soil-y water
Maddy – we let the dog eat the barf?
Franki – I really did email you, my email address is probably picked up by spam filter by all the apologies issued by the furiousBall home office for old man scrotal issues
November 28th, 2007 at 11:41 am
Do dogs have a gacking sound as distinctive as the feline “wacka wacka wacka GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK” sound?
Once upon a time I took a sip of my water in the dark and discovered that there had been a millipede in my water and that it was now in my mouth. Ack! Ack! Ack! Obviously I forgot to change the millipede filter again. Remembered ever since, though.
November 28th, 2007 at 11:54 am
Chris – holy shit, that millipede story is horrible. luckily Zig doesn’t get many hairballs, but yes I know that sound well
November 28th, 2007 at 12:09 pm
D’oh – and tres cool about your song!
November 28th, 2007 at 12:29 pm
Isn’t that why women had long hair? (to mop up spills) The vaccuum works pretty good.
November 28th, 2007 at 12:36 pm
hopefully yogi’s vomit was not also foreshadowing…..
November 28th, 2007 at 1:19 pm
So, I LOVE the song. I hadn’t heard it before. If my dogs vomit while Matt is gone, I make my son clean it up or their will be more vomit on the floor. (I think that I inherited this from my father.)
I’m glad that you are not alone in your misery…although I’d just rather do away with the misery all together. It’s nice to know that there are people you can count on to be there for you. I’m terribly sorry for your friends loss. I can’t imagine what her year must have been like either. Anywho, hope Yogi is feeling hetter…and hope you’re staying warm. Mr. I’m not turning on the heat unless the kids are here.
November 28th, 2007 at 2:02 pm
Yeah, like Chris I was gonna mention the cat sound, though I’d call it a “glugga glugga” vibe. And then I’d thank God (if I believed in Him) for paper towels. Yeah.
November 28th, 2007 at 2:12 pm
Chris – thank you and thank you
Lorrie – wow, now that’s adaptation
Jodi – nope, he was fine right afterwards, in fact he fell back to sleep and didn’t wake while i cleaned up
april – hey thanks, and thank you for listening. Yogi is fine. And the woodburning stove is doing fine, nice and cozy
* – yeah i agree, it is more of a “glugga glugga”, or maybe my cat is English?
November 28th, 2007 at 4:56 pm
my cat goes gaaaaaack all of the time, but i am guessing kitty gack is smaller than doggie gack!
November 28th, 2007 at 5:36 pm
Poor Yogi, first the attack of the trash can and now the vomit debacle. Hope that’s the end of it.
I’ve been wondering, will your pipes freeze if you only use the heat of the fireplace? Should I start knitting pipe cozies?
November 28th, 2007 at 6:22 pm
Wow….poor pup. I hope he’s better.
November 28th, 2007 at 7:06 pm
Hilly – I bet it’s much smaller than my big pup’s GAAAACK for sure, he’s about 115 pounds
Carolyn – I’m going to run it at a low temp on those nights and let my faucets drip, but just out of curiosity, yes make pipe cozies
notfearingchange – he’s fine, but he’s trying to milk it for extra milkbones already
November 28th, 2007 at 10:15 pm
My old dog used to eat his GAAAACK before I could even get to the paper towels which then always made me GAAAACK!
And maybe it’s just my sick mind, but that “pipe cozies” comment just made me laugh out loud! I am dutifully ashamed of myself.
November 29th, 2007 at 12:02 am
as long as you didn’t mop it up with fruitcake and then feed it to the poor pukey fella…
November 29th, 2007 at 9:44 am
Mary – sounds like a GAAAACKfest over there
gigglechick – I have my limits and fruitcake isn’t that absorbent any way
November 29th, 2007 at 2:20 pm
My dog used to eat his GAAK too — and mine. *shudder*
November 29th, 2007 at 2:26 pm
mamatulip – wow, that’s some dog you’ve got there.
November 29th, 2007 at 11:18 pm
Sorry about the water on the floor, but I can commiserate with you about the animal barf. Four animals, 3 of which have a habit of eating things they shouldn’t = much puke in bad places at bad times (like 2 a.m.).
December 4th, 2007 at 5:15 pm
‘moonlit deer paths’ sound like a good place to run.